A pastor once gave an Advent lesson involving prayer.. He encouraged us to pray one prayer during the season and it didn’t matter what that prayer was. He stated that if we were single and wanting a spouse, we could pray that prayer all of advent. Every made for tv holiday came flooding back to my mind. I try to leave my sarcasm at the door when I go to church, but some days it sneaks back in the window.
It’s the time of year where the award-winning holiday movies flood our girly tv networks and watch them like fools. After watching my fair share of these movies I’m fairly certain my Mr. Right is either on a crazy holiday adventure to find me where he is:
A. possibly stranded somewhere due to snow
B. he’s currently a workaholic and needs the christmas magic to soften his heart and make him realize what’s really important.
My family doesn’t own a picture perfect cabin in the woods so I don’t even have the option of kidnapping/paying a gentleman to pretend to be my boyfriend for the week only to fall in love after the big lie is exposed. I’m not a lawyer, but I’m pretty sure that’s illegal.
Why must these networks play into our hopeless romantic hearts created by Disney and the princesses? I have observed that our leading lady holds a good job throughout our holiday story. I appreciate the networks portraying strong women in the workplace. However, I’ve noticed that our leading lady is one of two things when it comes to her career choice. She is either a workaholic who lives in the big city and just hasn’t had the time to date or is just down right cold-hearted. If our leading lady isn’t crushing it in the corporate world, she’s running that adorable small town shop. I don’t hold a business degree, but I do know you have to sell a crap ton of coffee to make a living and her shop just doesn’t seem that busy to me.
As for the romance and love story build up. Can a girl not be happily married or happily single? Why doe she need to take him hostage and pretend it’s her boyfriend? Disney finally caught onto this and gave us the Scottish princess Merida from Brave who saved her own self. While the Frozen girls still had a love story playing out, the main part was about sisters and their relationship. Take note Hallmark and Lifetime, we will still give you our valued yoga pants and coffee time if you divert from your story lines.
As for the “mom on strike” holiday classic. We’re kinda over that one. You created the holiday stress to begin with so I show you no sympathy. If feeding 30 people is stressing you out, don’t invite them over….duh.
Also, the storyline of girl stranded somewhere in a storm with a dude she doesn’t like but will end up loving is done. The horse is dead, please stop shooting it.
Now that we’ve sorted out our lovely little plot options, we need to name our movie. I love a good play on words, but oh man do these guys win the prize. A Cookie Cutter Christmas, A Boyfriend For Christmas, The Santa Con… the list keeps going.
We will also need a cast for this lovely little classic, good news my readers. Hallmark uses the same 20 people in every movie or show. Who has time to cast fresh faces any more? Enemies in one show, lovers in another. This isn’t confusing my mind one bit as I take in these fabulous features.
I know I will end up watching these award-winning shows because you just can’t avoid them. They will suck us in and fill us with fictional Christmas magic for a brief moment. If you come across any holiday movies that have a little more depth to them please let me know. I’m open for suggestions or maybe I’ll just write my own.
I thought I would spice up our movie watching experience and made some holiday movie bingo cards for you! Download them and play with your friends, or just watch a few movies one saturday and have yourself a jolly time. Holiday Movie Bingo